Forgiveness
When I say I’ve struggled with the idea of forgiving those who have harmed me, please believe me, I mean it! For those of you who speak Astrology, I am a Scorpio with five planets in fixed signs including a T-Square involving the Sun, Saturn, Mars and Neptune. For the rest of you that means I know how to hold a grudge. Not forgiving was one of my main sources of strength for a long time, a source I would not recommend.
So, why forgive?
I wouldn’t recommend it out of some kind of goody-goody mentality but recommend it because it will liberate a huge amount of your energy.
So here’s my take on this whole forgiving business:
#1: Holding a grudge, not forgiving, takes a lot of energy. Forgiveness releases that energy and makes it available to you.
Anytime you block the flow of constant movement you create stagnation. Stagnation is not natural and leads to decay, whether in a pond or in your emotional system. What happens is you lock up multiple types of energy. You lock up the energy of your view of the person not being forgiven. Instead of seeing the different facets of the person, you insist on focusing on the one aspect central to the accusation in your mind that you are deciding not to forgive. So you hold one view of the person in question and use your vital life-force energy to fight off other views.
#2 Not forgiving does not punish ‘them’ it punishes you.
‘They’ might not even know about the grudge you are holding. The object of your inability to forgive probably just assumes you are having a bad day with that sour look on your face and not get it that you are ‘punishing’ them with your gaze, silence, passive aggression or whatever your technique may be. Most people around you won’t know enough of the story to really be on your side and will just experience your negative energy. That energy becomes part of your frequency and that frequency then distorts the reality you are manifesting.
Let’s say you are wasting energy doing something like obsessing over an issue or holding a grudge. This does require an expenditure of energy. Then, you also try to hide the fact that you are holding a grudge. Now you are spending your vital life force energy in both of these, quite unproductive, directions. You have a lot of vital life force sitting there in stalemate within you and that’s not healthy for body, mind or soul.
#4 The Big Picture
The big picture transcends lifetimes. On a ‘karmic’ level you are not here to avenge wrongs committed against you. You are not here for retribution or to settle scores. You are here to remember the big picture while mired in a 3-D body and all of the things it attaches to. Not forgiving just keeps you in the valley rather than up on the mountain top where the view is more comprehensive. Not forgiving just means that you’ll have to ‘do it over’ with that person in another time and another place. Not forgiving, then, is a brilliant way to be held back in the same grade so you can do your lessons over.